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Sunday, September 20, 2009

In My Next Life. . .

I want to be Damien, I mean Shawn. Oh Shawn has such a great life. She always has. Where Scout came from a traumatic kittenhood, Shawn was oblivious to any trauma except being left by her mom on the sidewalk. But then along came Tom and rescued her. My god, that was the worst decision he could have made because as the years went by I started to understand why Shawn's mom left her there in the street. I think she knew Shawn was a devil dog from hell and wanted to end it just like Gregory Peck in The Omen. I never tried taking Shawn into a church but I fear she would run screaming out of the building. But then again so would I, so let's forget that.

Anyhow, after we found Shawn she has lived La Vida Loca. She wasn't Top Kitty at first but when she got bigger than Scout, it was all over. When she took over, she really took over. Poor Scout has to fight for her food and her territory and sometimes her life. Let's face it. Shawn is a BULLY! Tom says she gets it from me but he is so wrong.

She sleeps about 22 hours per day. We used to feed them only dry food until Shawn got Diabetes (all cured now) and we had to begin feeding her wet food. Well, we are still feeding them wet food. Her life consists of waking up in the morning sitting on the kitchen rug or my GelPro Mat waiting until Daddy comes in to feed her. Then she waits until Tom leaves and eats the rest of Scout's food and then plops on the sofa or on her perch by the kitchen window. She then sleeps for hours until around 4pm where she realizes that it might be dinnertime. Then she gets up usually while I am starting dinner and gets underfoot. The thing about Shawn is that she is fearless. Until you accidentally step on her does she realize maybe that wasn't a good place to be. Luckily, she is not the brightest bulb in the pack so she quickly forgets the trauma and then comes back to get underfoot again. Like I said, not the brightest.

She gets fed, then goes to sleep in the sun room, the guest room or on the other side of my sofa. Sometimes she wakes up when Tom is around to get brushed and rubbed. But mainly she plops wherever she wants and sleeps. If she wants love, she demands it and gets it. She has people doing everything for her including cleaning up her poop even when she decides that it is too far to go out to the litterbox and poops wherever she wants. She doesn't do it often but I know she does it out of spite because it only happens when she doesn't get fed right away or she is mad for some reason or another. Stupid cat.

She has no stress except when she thinks she might not get wet food. The other trauma is when the dry food has run out and she can't gorge herself. Every once in a while she does get yelled at when she is trying to eat Scout's food. The only other stress might come from her hatred of Scout. But because she is a little dopey she only rages when she actually sees poor Scout. I don't think she holds a grudge. She just starts new grudges.

So in my next life, I want her life. Eating, sleeping and doing nothing. She lives in a nice house, gets fed, gets a first class catsitter when we are gone, gets love on demand and does what she wants. She is a devil but who couldn't love a face like that?

1 comment:

  1. Oh my gosh Shawn is beautiful and yes you can see she has the good life. I think I want to be her too so I can sleep that long! LOL

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