Monday, October 7, 2013

Of Personal Space and me not punching someone

Okay, it's a good thing I am pretty evened tempered. I am also good about being nice to everyone. But sometimes people drive me to the point of breaking and going all medieval on them.

Case in point. The other day, I am at Walmart. Yes, I every so often have to go to Walmart although it is a scary place. Anyhow, I am at Walmart doing a little shopping and getting a prescription. Usually I go early and there is no one there. I was running late so I went a little later than usual.

Because it's later there were a few people on line in front of me. And, of course, there is only one person at the checkout helping with the prescriptions. Whenever I am on line at Walmart, I avoid all eye contact. I avoid all conversation and just bide my time checking my emails, Facebook and Twitter.

Inevitably, someone will talk to me although I am engrossed in my own little world. I am always pleasant and try to be nice. Well, of course, some older lady starts asking me about Claritan D. Okay, it is obvious I do not work at there so why is she asking me, right?

I am pleasant and say I have no idea. Then she goes on and says that it is probably behind the counter because those drugs are used to cook meth. Okay, why she brings that up is beyond me. In the meantime, I spy the Claritan behind the counter and say there it is. I think it is over so I go back to emailing. She is still talking. In situations such as these, I turn away and pretend I am busy. She continues talking to the man and his child behind her on line.

At one moment, I turn to look and I can see this guy is praying the woman just shuts up. The kid is looking scared and I am still avoiding all eye contact. About 10 minutes pass and she is still talking to the guy behind her. I keep faking my interest in my phone.

I finally get up to the front of the line. I am standing there when I feel that someone is just a little too close to me. Now, I am a hugger so I am not scared to be close to people nor does it freak me out. But I do have issues with people who have no concept of personal space.

I really, really hate when people get in my personal space unless they are my friends, family or some hot guy. It bugs me to no end. So this woman has come up right behind me to the point that she is almost touching me. I started twitching. I could feel my skin crawl. I wanted to punch her.

Instead of being a Nasty Nellie, I decided to wait until she was distracted and then move up an inch or two. I figured that she wouldn't notice because she was still boring the dude behind her. So, slowly I took one foot and slid it about an inch. Then I took my other foot and slid that about an inch. Then I relaxed, that is until the woman got all up in my personal space. WTH? So I tried another tactic. I sort of leaned to the side to get away from her and she came right up and stood right next to me. I wanted to scream and OMG, I almost hit her.

Luckily, at that time I was called up to the cashier. I was so happy. I was free of her. I figured that now I could have my personal space back since there is a line on the floor that tells you where to wait until a cashier is open. Plus, common courtesy is that you wait behind the line until moving up.

I was wrong.

There I was telling the cashier my last name, first name and birthday. I was just getting my birth year out when I suddenly felt a presence and turned around and was horrified to see that woman had come up right next to me as I was getting my prescription. At this point, I felt my skin crawl and my fist starting to close.

I almost died. I actually turned and gave her the look of death. She was oblivious. I turned and saw the look of horror on the face of the cashier as well. I finally turned and just looked at the lady and gave her another dirty look. She didn't even respond. No sorry, no apology. She didn't even move back. She just stood there. I should have punched her. Luckily, my prescription was ready and that stopped me from resorting to violence.

But I swear she harshed my mellow and I was not a happy camper. I am just glad I don't freak out but let me tell you, I wanted to go all medieval on her. I really wanted to yell: Personal Space Lady, ever heard of it? I probably would have used different words but I thought that it would be bad if I yelled profanities at some lady in Walmart. Although, it's not like I haven't seen that before in Walmart.

So I took my purchase and walked away but not before I shot her another look. I also caught the eye of the guy behind her and he just shook his head. Yes, he got it.

Photos: Microsoft Clip Art


  1. Oh my gosh - one time I was at a concert at Ohio State. At the stadium. Nothing but room all around, folks. And I was in line for the ladies room. And this chick behind me, who was in her 40s or 50s is standing with her boobs SMASHED into my back. No joke. WTH? FHITH